Screens

In a 2012 Parks and Recreation episode, the beloved character Tom Haverford (played by Aziz Ansari) gets into legal trouble after crashing his car due to texting and driving. In order to help Tom break his smartphone addiction, the judge comes up with an unusual punishment: Tom is not allowed to look at any type of digital screen for a week. This of course devastates Tom and leads to some funny attempts on his part to skirt around the ruling. Ultimately, the episode’s humor stems from the fact that Tom can’t imagine life without technology and struggles intensely when he’s forced to try to live without it.

I can sympathize with Tom, and I don’t think I’m alone in that. We spend a great deal of our time staring at screens: smartphones, TVs, computers, tablets and others. Our everyday life revolves around the things that we can do on these screens. We use them for communication, for productivity, for entertainment, and even for health and safety. Our screens can do everything, and so we spend a lot of time with them. We couldn’t really do life without them at this point.

As our dependence on screens has increased, so has their size. Imagine a phone from ten years ago compared with a phone today. Even imagine a phone a few years ago compared to phones today. Screens have taken over the entirety of our phones, replacing any physical buttons, and now the screens are increasing in size, making our phones even bigger. TV screens have gotten massive as their quality as improved, and we are just on the brink of the introduction of 4K resolution to consumers. Laptops and tablets pretty much stay the same size, but overall, screens are getting bigger and invading our lives more and more.

But they’re not just getting bigger. They’re getting more pervasive. Have you seen a Buffalo Wild Wings lately? Screens are becoming a part of our everyday lives to the point that we’re hardly able to avoid them. They’re in our bedrooms, our classrooms, our restaurants, our churches, our offices, our cars, and everywhere else. If there isn’t a TV or a computer in the room, we pull out our phones, allowing screens to become a part of the atmosphere we’re in. Even if we’re not using them, the screens are there, and they make a difference.

I once had a professor who refused to allow screens to invade the classroom space during our time together. He blocked our view of the computer in the room and had everyone take notes by hand. He didn’t make a big deal about it; it was just a part of his teaching style. But one day, he brought a TV into the room to show a video, and it was weird. The screen felt foreign, like it was invading a space where it wasn’t welcome. And I felt much better when I came back for the next class and saw that it wasn’t there. Because screens change things.

I’m not saying screens are bad. I probably spend more time staring at a screen than most other people I know. It’s my job, and it’s necessary for my education. Also, it’s juts a lot of fun. There are days when I feel like doing nothing else but staring at a screen for a while, and it can be great. I love screens! I’m just saying that they make a difference, and we might do well to be aware of that. I know I wrote a lot just to say that, but I hope this post has been helpful (or at least entertaining) to you. Thanks for reading, friends, and I’ll see you next week!

Alternating

I am very concerned about efficiency. I do my best to ensure that I can get the greatest amount of work done in the least amount of time possible while still doing it well. This has really come in handy throughout my lengthy (and still ongoing) education. It helps me stay on top of my assignments but still have time to sleep, connect with other people, and enjoy hobbies. Efficiency is what has gotten me this far.

Recently, I’ve been thinking about my method of ensuring efficiency and if it’s really the best thing for me. I’ve come to the conclusion that what I’m doing works well, so I’m not going to change it. But in the process of thinking through my approach, I thought it might be nice to actually write it out and share it with you guys not only for my own benefit but also in hopes that it might be helpful for you. So this week’s blog post will be a little more practical than reflective. I hope that’s alright with you. Here’s my approach to efficiency and getting stuff done.

Basically, the secret to my success is giving myself little rewards throughout the day. If I have a 20-page paper to do, I set small, specific goals, and then I reward myself every time I reach one. If my goal is to write a section, I’ll give myself a snack break when I finish that section. If I need to read a certain source, I’ll let myself watch an episode of TV or read a chapter from a fun book when I’m finished. Giving myself little rewards after completing small goals eventually leads to finishing the big project.

I call my approach alternating. I try to never get bogged down on one thing for too terribly long. I can’t write a long paper in one long sitting. I’ll get burned out. I have to switch to something else every once in a while, and that’s where the short goals and rewards come in. It lets my mind switch out of whatever mode I’m in so that it can rest and be ready when I get back to it.

I often switch back and forth between work and something fun. But sometimes, there’s just too much to do. So I have to switch between two or three different kinds of work. But even then, the same system applies. I choose whatever work I’m most looking forward to (or least dreading) and use that as my reward for finishing the more difficult or less fun work. For example, I will work on an assigned reading until I finish a chapter, and then I’ll let myself do something fun but still productive like working on the podcast I’m making with some friends. It doesn’t have to be switching between productive and unproductive. It just has to be switching between two (or more) things.

The benefit of this approach is that it practically removes the threat of burnout. I can switch back and forth between two productive things all day and be just fine. But if I try to do just one productive thing all day long, it takes longer and ends up worse because I burn myself out. I think alternating is the ideal way of tackling things that require productivity.

Now, I do recognize that there are times when this process doesn’t apply. If you’re in an extreme time crunch and absolutely have to get something done, then this process can be harmful. For example, I once put off editing a 45-minute video until the day before it was due, and so I had no choice but to focus solely on that assignment for a full day. But if you’re planning ahead and making sure you have plenty of time to do something right, I’d say alternating is the way to go.

So there you go. That’s how I get things done. It’s not profound or new or mind-blowing. But it works for me, and who knows, maybe it can work for you. If you’ve read this far, thank you for sticking with me through this sort of different blog post this week. I hope you have a great week, and I’ll see you next time!

Marketable

It seems like my whole life up to this point has been building toward getting a job. When I was a kid, people constantly asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. In high school, I was told to make good grades so that I could get into a good college so that I could get a good job and thus have a good life. Now I’m in seminary receiving theological and practical training for whatever ministry job I feel called into when I graduate. All of this is moving in one direction: my career. And that can be sort of scary.

This mentality of everything in a young person’s life building to getting a job can really get into a person’s head. It can lead one to believe that getting a good job is all that there is, and that if one cannot find a good job immediately after going through school, he or she is a failure. It leads young people to believe that they are products they have to sell to potential employers, and their ability to sell themselves is indicative of their self-worth. Basically, we’re all just trying to make ourselves marketable.

I have a problem with this. First of all, this mentality puts a huge amount of pressure on young people. If one does poorly on an exam and fails a course, his or her career opportunities can suddenly seem unrealistically limited. And that’s not healthy. When I’m learning about something in a class, my mind should be on the subject at hand, not constantly on how my grade in the class could affect my future. I can’t learn properly if I’m constantly distracted by thinking too far ahead.

I also think that there is more to life than one’s career. Yes, that’s an important aspect of a person’s life, but it’s not all that there is. A person should seek a career that is fulfilling, but success isn’t just defined by how good of a job one has. There’s family, friends, faith, creativity, and any number of other things that contribute significantly to a person’s quality of life. Spending the first twenty-two years of your life believing that your career is the only important thing about your future isn’t healthy.

After going through public school, four years of high school, and part of my seminary degree, I’m still not entirely sure what I’m qualified for, if anything. I certainly wouldn’t consider myself an expert at anything. I’m educated in a variety of areas. I can have an intelligent conversation with other people about most topics. But I’m not ridiculously good at any one thing. And that’s OK.

The truth is that I’m still learning. And honestly, we all should be. It takes years to master something, and it certainly takes a lot more than just studying it in school. In order to become “marketable,” a person needs real-world experience. He or she needs to be learn the trade by doing it, not just by studying it. I’m not saying education is bad. I’m obviously a firm believer in it. But I know that I’ve got to do a lot more than just study books in order to become a minister. Each of us should be constantly striving to learn more and to improve ourselves in whatever area we find ourselves working. As long as we’re doing that, we’re going to be just fine.

I am not a product. I am a person in the process of growing, learning, and changing. Maybe I’m not the most marketable commodity on the market right now. But that’s OK. I’ll get there. My career path will take some twists and turns, and I have no idea where it will actually end up. But I know that as I long as I find the right thing, work hard at it, and continually strive to improve in it, I won’t have to worry about marketing myself because I’ll be right where I belong. And I wish the same for each of you.

The Value of Experiences

Life has a way of really shoving something in our faces when it wants us to learn it, and that’s exactly what life has been doing to me lately with this topic. Three different times from three different people over the last few weeks, I’ve had discussions about the fact that we should value experiences more than possessions. None of these conversations were related. They were all organic and started by the other person. But if something comes up in my life that many times, it’s probably something I should pay attention to. So here I am thinking it through in the form of a blog post.

Money is something we all have a limited amount of. And what we do with that money says a lot about us. It tells us what we value the most. It’s different for everyone. Some people pour tons of money into a hobby or a collection. Others take expensive vacations. Others buy fancy cars. But whatever we choose to spend our money on is indicative of what we value the most. And lately I’ve been wondering if my spending habits have been lining up with my values.

Like many others, I spend a significant amount of money on stuff. I like stuff. I like adding things to my DVD collection. I like having nice, new clothes. I like books and junk food. But are all these things really the most important? Are they what I truly value the most? If so, what does that say about me? And if not, then why am I investing so much of my limited money into them?

I’d like to believe that people and relationships are the most important things in my life. As someone who is called into ministry, it’s especially important that I don’t get sucked into the trap of materialism. My calling is to love people, so they should probably be my priority. Which means they should also be the main things I’m spending my time, money, and effort on.

The truth is that even though things are great, they could never measure up to meaningful experiences. No DVD box set could compare to a weekend with my family. No article of clothing could bring me as much joy as a night out with my friends. I’m not saying that spending money on things is bad. I’m saying that it shouldn’t be the main thing we’re investing in. Because things don’t have as much value as experiences do.

Think about it this way. If I buy a huge, new TV, I’m really going to enjoy it for a bit. But my enjoyment with the TV will decrease with time. I’m going to get used to having such a big TV and wish I had an even bigger one. Plus, the TV will become outdated after a few years and need to be replaced. So my enjoyment of this TV will decrease with time. But if I took the same amount of money that I would spend on the TV and spent it on a fun experience with people I care about, my enjoyment of that experience would not only exceed my enjoyment of the TV; it would also increase with time. I would be able to reflect on that experience for years to come and enjoy it over and over again. It would never become outdate or need replacing. It would always be there to enjoy. That’s so much better than a TV, or any other thing that I could buy.

So I’m trying to value experiences over things. Because experiences are ultimately worth more, even when I’m distracted by the allure of some shiny new object. Nothing beats a trip with my family or a meal out with someone special. Those experiences are just valuable; they’re priceless. And the sooner I see that and start choosing to invest in them, the better. May you invest in experiences that will bring you fulfillment now and for years to come. Have a great week, friends!

Unresponded Texts

We all do it. If you say you don’t do it, you’re lying. We may as well just admit it now: Everyone leaves some text messages unresponded every once in a while. I don’t do it a lot. But it does happen from time to time, and I’m using this as an opportunity to admit it. Maybe my public confession will give you an opportunity to confess it as well.

It’s not like I mean to. I don’t (usually) look at a text and think, “I’m not going to respond to this.” It’s just that things come up. Maybe I don’t know how to respond at the moment, so I set it aside and end up forgetting. Maybe I’m in the middle of something that I can’t really get away from, and I just never get around to responding later. Maybe the text just doesn’t seem meaningful—or sensical—enough to merit a response. I don’t know. What I do know is that I often check my phone and find that I neglected to respond to a text that I received several hours before.

It doesn’t bother me so much when I’m the one who isn’t responding. But when it’s my text message that isn’t receiving the response, things feel a little different. When I’m the one waiting for the other person to text me back and wondering why they aren’t, it sometimes upsets me a little bit (or more). Even though I know in my head that I forget to respond to texts all the time, it bothers me when other people neglect to respond to my messages. It’s illogical, I know. But it’s the way it is.

I know it’s a silly example, but the truth is that we all have double standards. We excuse ourselves for the same things that we hold others accountable for. When we’re the ones doing the bothersome thing, we always have an excuse. But when someone else does something that bothers us, we won’t accept anything short of an apology (and sometimes even that won’t work). We constantly give ourselves the benefit of the doubt but rarely extend that same grace to others. This should not be so.

Here’s what I think the problem really is: We judge ourselves on our intentions, but we judge others on their actions. We can look into our own minds and see that we don’t mean to hurt other people, but we can’t look into the minds of other people. And so we assume the worst. When they hurt us, we don’t think about their intentions. We focus on what they did and how it affected us. And thus, the double standard is born.

What if we extended the same grace to others that we are always so willing to show ourselves? What if we chose not to assume the worst but instead to give others the benefit of the doubt and believe that, even if their actions were hurtful, their intentions were pure? We’re obviously capable of this; we just choose not to. I’m not saying it’s easy. But I am saying it’s possible, and I think it could make relating with other people a lot easier.

Call me naive, but I tend to think that most people are good people. Yes, there are some people out their with truly evil intentions, but they are few and far between. I believe that most people at their core are good and have good intentions, even if they struggle to live those intentions out. Most people I have met in my life have been kind and helpful, not mean or intentionally hurtful. If we give people the benefit of the doubt and show them grace even when they do things that bother us, we may be able to see past their misguided actions and actually see how good people really are.

So I’m going to try to stop assuming the worst when my texts go unanswered. And I’m going to do my best to extend the grace that I show myself in the face of my mistakes to other people. Because when it comes down to it, who we are is so much more than simply what we do. And if we give other people the chance to show us that, we may be pleasantly surprised.

That’s all I had to say this week. I hope this blog post has been uplifting to you, friends. Have a great week, and I’ll see you soon!